Happy 2014! Here's a few little stories on a variety of subjects to get you going:
Frugality:
Found in Grammie’s attic: a box of cups without handles, and a box of cup handles.
Wrong Impression:
A little boy noticed a framed collection of fishing flies and lures on Dr. Bozuwa’s office wall.
“You must love fishing, Dr. Bozuwa,” the boy observed.
“I don’t fish,” replied Dr. Bozuwa, “I took all those flies and lures from people’s heads.”
Getting the Lay of the Land:
The plumber arrived at the farmhouse with a tool box in hand. The farmer pointed to the second door on the right. “That’s where the stopped up sink is,” he said, “but go in quick and shut the door behind you. Mother’s taking a tub, and if there’s a draft, she’ll be ugly.”
And Finally, How We Talk to Each Other:
Q: Think it’ll ever stop snowing?
A: Always has before.
Q: How long will it take to get to Exeter?
A: Depends how fast you go.
Q: How do you get to Claremont?
A: Usually my son takes me.
Q: How you doing?
A: Pretty good considering what I've been through.
Q: What you been through?
A: Well, the last thing was a set of stairs.
Q: Can I take this bridge to Vermont?
A: You could but I wouldn’t recommend it.
Q: Does this road go to Chichester?
A: Nope. Stays right where it is.
Q: Do I go over the covered bridge to get to Vermont?
A: If I was you, I’d go through it.
Q: How’s your husband?
A: Compared to what?
Q: How do you do? My name is Becky Rule.
A: Mine isn’t.
At the roundhouse train station (that used to be in Concord, NH):
Q: Where you headed?
A: None of your damned business, and I wouldn’t tell you that much if you weren’t my sister.
Any terse exchanges in the Yankee style that make you laugh? Post them here in the comment section or send them to me at [email protected]. You’re apt to see your suggestions in future blog posts. It’s my mission to collect these little bits of culture and pass them on in the New Year and many more (knock wood) to come.
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