Just Ask Ida

All Hail the King

Are you lonesome tonight,
do you miss me tonight? 

I’m still feeling a little blue this morning. If you’re an Elvis fan, you know why. Thirty-seven years ago this past Saturday, the King moved on to that Great Show Room in the Sky. I sure do miss him. What a sexy man! Fat or thin, I don’t care. There was something about Elvis.

In 1977, Charlie and me had tickets to see Elvis in Portland. I could not believe he was actually coming to Maine. Boston maybe, but Portland? How could we not go? I mean, our first dance together as husband and wife, was to Elvis singing “All Shook Up.” The Portland concert was going to be our anniversary and Christmas present, all rolled into one. Was I excited? Oh Mister Man, I hardly slept for a week! 

Then, the day before the concert, I’m working at the A&P, ringing out Mrs. St. Cyr, when Rita runs across the street from Smitty’s hardware where she was working. They always had a little transistor radio playing in the back there. She’s crying, “Ida! Ida! He’s dead! He’s dead!” 

“Oh my God, honey! Who is?” I thought something had happened to one of her kids, she was so upset.

“Mon Dieu,” Mrs. St. Cyr cries, “The Pope? Pope Paul?” 

“No, Elvis! He died today in Memphis!”

Mrs. St. Cyr looked a little miffed, but I got all numb inside. Anyone else, I would have thought they were joking, but Rita would never do something like that to me. I could tell by her face it was true. Elvis was gone. 

I didn’t cry. I just finished bagging Mrs. St. Cyr’s groceries, walked out back, got my pocketbook and went home. I sat in the living room listening to “Elvis: A Legendary Performer, Volume 2”, hanging on the King’s every word. Still no tears. Not until Charlie come home. When he hugged me, I started sobbing like a baby. August 16, 1977. Elvis was just 42-years-old. 

So every year on the anniversary of his death, rather than moping, the Women Who Run With the Moose have a party where we celebrate all things Elvis. The Husbands of the Women Who Run With the Moose pretend to tolerate this, but I know they understand. Elvis was a big part of all our lives when we were growing up. Besides, it gives them an excuse to hang out down to the Brew Ha Ha, drink beer and play darts.

This year, our Elvis night was held at Betty’s, and she had a Hawaiian theme going in honor of the King’s “Aloha from Hawaii” special. That’s the one where Elvis has on that tight, white jump suit cut low in the front with bell bottoms, a stand up collar and rhinestones all over. You know, the concert where he shows off some of his karate moves?

Us girls all dressed up tropical, though we skipped the grass skirts and coconut bras. As Shirley says, “We crossed that bridge a long time ago.” Betty always does it up real nice. She had taken a trip down to “Let’s Party” in Bangor, and got lots of cute decorations, including an inflatable palm tree, a set of little pineapple lights, plastic drinking glasses that looked just like coconuts and a lei for each of us. Elvis loved Hawaiian Punch apparently, so we drank diet Hawaiian Punch and rum. 

Now, you’re probably thinking we had a luau, but no. We ate what we always eat on August 16th: Elvis’ favorite foods. Dot brought a bucket of fried chicken and Shirley made southern style sausage gravy over biscuits (talk about a heart attack on a plate). For vegetables, Celeste actually did collard greens cooked with ham hocks. Instead of sweet potato pie, Rita did her famous sweet potato bake with the miniature marshmallows on the top, which I know Elvis would have loved.

The King’s favorite dessert was Pound Cake. It’s hard to get really excited about that. So lately I’ve been making Chocolate Stuff from the Sweet Potato Queens’ Cookbook. If you have not tried Chocolate Stuff, you are missing something. Chocolate Stuff may not solve the world’s problems, but honey, you’ll forget about them while you’re eating this cake.

Yesterday, I did what I did thirty-seven years ago, and every August 17th since. In honor of the King, I made a fried peanut butter and banana sandwich for breakfast, then settled down in front of the tube. We saw “Blue Hawaii” Saturday night, and the “Aloha” special, of course. Yesterday, I watched “King Creole” and “Viva Las Vegas”. I rotate movies every year, but I always have to feast my eyes on the “1968 Comeback Special.” That’s the one where Elvis is dressed entirely in black with a leather jacket. He’s playing the guitar all intimate and that smile. Oh mister man, it just melts my heart!

I'm in love
I'm all shook up
Mm mm oh, oh, yeah, yeah!
I’m all shook up 

That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!

IDA's PODCAST: All Hail the King 

Coming Up This Week:

August 19  Reading, Southwest Harbor Public Library, 5:30 p.m., Southwest Harbor, ME

Upcoming Shows & Book Events: Summer

September 4  Ida’s Havin’ a Yard Sale, ACT ONE Festival 2014, 8:00 p.m. Portsmouth, NH

September 5  Ida’s Havin’ a Yard Sale, ACT ONE Festival 2014, 2:00 p.m. Portsmouth, NH

 

 

 

They Don’t Call it “Les Misérables” for Nothin’!

On Saturday, Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot, Shirley and me (a.k.a. the Women Who Run With the Moose) went to see that new movie, “Les Misérables.” And you know what? They don’t call it that for nothin’!

I confess, it was my bright idea. I says to the girls, “Hey, it’s a musical with a high hunk factor! I mean, Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe! How bad could it be?”

Well, turns out, pretty bad. Let’s start with the fact that it’s a poor personal hygiene movie. There should be a ratin’ for that. To heck with the G, PG13, R stuff. Give me at least some hint that everyone in the movie is gonna look like they smell bad. That the houses are gonna look like they smell bad. That there’s gonna be a whole scene where Hugh Jackman carries a guy through the sewer. It’s a good thing I had that movie-sized box of Junior Mints to calm down my tummy, ‘cause let me tell you, I was gettin’ a little queasy.

OK, so the hunkiness is pretty much down to zero without the aid of a bath, a tooth brush, some mouthwash and deodorant. Then you add questionable facial hair and more than one bad hairdo (Hugh sports three, at least), and we’re talkin’ a hunk factor of minus ten!

And the whole movie is murky. Brown and dark, even when it’s daytime. Why? ‘Cause it’s usually rainin’. The brightest thing is Anne Hathaway’s skin. That is, before she sells her hair and her back teeth, and then becomes a prostitute. I kept wondering, why would you do it in that order? I mean, if she was gonna become a prostitute anyway, why not try to look her best, so she could make a little more money? Didn’t make sense to me.

But I have to say, in a movie where everyone is singin’ and cryin’ and dyin’ (all at the same time), Anne knocks it outta the park with her big number. Even Shirley woke up for that one.

I guess we should have studied up on the plot. But shouldn’t you be able to get it from the movie itself? So, from what I can tell, it takes place in France after the Revolution, but I guess that didn’t solve anything. The people are still poor. They still don’t have enough to eat. So what do they do? They bust up their furniture and make a barricade. You’d think they’d just storm a bakery and a butcher shop, but I guess they’re too afraid to do that, ‘cause stealin’ a loaf of bread is about the worst thing you can do. Hugh Jackman learns this the hard way, and Russell Crowe won’t let him forget it. With all this life and death stuff goin’ on, the young folk do what they do best: fallin’ in love at first sight, or fallin’ in love with love or in love with the revolution, you name it. And boy, do they sing, swoon and cry up a storm. For almost three hours!

OK, spoiler alert. (Don’t say I didn’t warn you.) To be honest, it was kind of a relief when Russell Crowe kills himself after singin’ a long song while walkin’ on top of a dam. Frankly, a short suicide note would have done the trick. And it was more than a little surprising when Hugh Jackman died in a convent, but kept on singin’ and cryin’ anyway with Anne Hathaway, who I thought was dead. I don’t know.

Frankly, me and the girls were happy to get out of the theater and into a clear, crisp winter day. It may have been only 15 degrees, but the sun was shinin’ and we were back in Maine, the way life should be. Throw in some attitude adjustment over to Bugaboo Creek (Moose Juice and an onion blossom, anyone?) and off we went back to good ol’ Mahoosuc Mills, where people hardly ever sing and cry and die (at the same time, anyway). Hey, we even made up our own little ditty on the way home:
    In “Les Misérables,” everyone stunk
    Singin’ and cryin’ and dyin’, kerplunk!

What a great bunch of gals!

That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!

IDA'S PODCAST: Les Misérables

Start an "Unloose Your Inner Moose" Book Group

Twelve Chapters-twelve months-lots of fun and easy tips for "Livin' the Good Life". Just try one thing from one chapter a month, and by the end of the year, you'll be surprised at how your good life has gotten even better. Do it yourself, with a buddy or with a group.

Upcoming Book Events and Performances:

January 16
Book Reading
Portsmouth Public Library
7:00 p.m.
FMI: 603-427-1540
http://www.cityofportsmouth.com/library/
Portsmouth, NH
(snow date January 22)

January 23
Book Reading
Patten Free Library
6:30 p.m.
FMI: 207-443-5141
http://www.patten.lib.me.us/index.html
Bath, Me
(snow date January 30)

February 15-17
I Married an Alien!
Garrison Players
Friday & Saturday @ 8:00 p.m.
Sunday @ 3:00 p.m.
FMI: 603-750-4278
http://www.garrisonplayers.org/events.php
Rollinsford, NH

If you’d like me to do a reading at your library, organization or what not, please don’t hesitate to drop me a line:
[email protected]
And if your book group wants to read Finding Your Inner Moose, I’d love to be part of the discussion. Especially if food’s involved!