Emerson Heald told a couple of tales at the Auburn Historical Society meeting earlier this month. He recalled his father, Benjamin, (known for his colorful language)working in the garage when he bunged up his finger good and it was bleeding all over.
In the house, Emerson’s mother found the bandages. She said, “What did you say when you bunged up that finger?”
Benjamin said, “Nothin’. Wa’n’t nobody there to hear.”
Emerson also told about the minister in Northwood who announced to the congregation that the $4000 needed for church renovation had been located.
“Where is it?” the delighted congregation wanted to know.
The minister said, “It’s still in your wallets.”
Oh, why not one more?
Emerson explained that the church was full on a Sunday when the devil appeared. The congregation fled. All except for one little old lady. “Why are you still here?” the devil asked.
“I ain’t afraid of you,” she said. “I was married to your brother for thirty years.”
Thank you, Emerson Heald. You make me smile!
In the house, Emerson’s mother found the bandages. She said, “What did you say when you bunged up that finger?”
Benjamin said, “Nothin’. Wa’n’t nobody there to hear.”
Emerson also told about the minister in Northwood who announced to the congregation that the $4000 needed for church renovation had been located.
“Where is it?” the delighted congregation wanted to know.
The minister said, “It’s still in your wallets.”
Oh, why not one more?
Emerson explained that the church was full on a Sunday when the devil appeared. The congregation fled. All except for one little old lady. “Why are you still here?” the devil asked.
“I ain’t afraid of you,” she said. “I was married to your brother for thirty years.”
Thank you, Emerson Heald. You make me smile!
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