Most women are more loyal to their hairdresser than they are to their gynecologist. I’ve been going to Pasty down to Hair Affair every Saturday morning since Moby Dick was a minnow. For the record, Patsy is a good solid hairdresser. Sure, occasionally she gets a little distracted and I’m forced to do a “Hairdresser Smackdown,” but all in all, she’s a keeper.
As a rule, Charlie doesn’t fuss much with his hair, or what’s left of it anyway. He’d been going to the barber shop downtown forever. But when Alfie Pinette retired, no one stepped in to take his place. So, Charlie’s started dropping into Ol’ Yankee Clippers in Dover-Foxcroft whenever he’s over there running errands.
Now our little guy Scamp used to go to So Dog Gone Good, but they closed awhile back, too. Mahoosuc Mills just couldn’t support a doggie spa. Go figure. But Margery Howe stepped into the breach and does dog grooming and doggie daycare out of her home. Thankfully Scamp just loves her.
I’ll let the poet laureate of Mahoosuc Mills tell you all about it.
Time for a haircut, Scamp’s all excited
Hopping about like he’s been ignited
I take him over to Margery Howe
The one game in town, “Salon de Bow-Wow”
It’s a chance for ol’ Scamp to get social, of course
And let all those other dogs know who is boss
Maybe while Margery dotes over him
I’ll go and see about getting a trim
When I am almost to Ol’ Yankee Clippers
I notice, egads! I’m still in my slippers!
But nobody minds, they’re nice as can be
And I kinda like when they fuss over me
When you walk in, it’s as if you belong
And they never keep you waiting for long
Each of them gals knows what she’s doin’
And no one walks out with their hair all a-ruin
When she is working, Deloris’ll hum
Some kind of melody, what is it from?
A song from the past? Do I know that one?
All of a sudden, Deloris is done
Charlotte is quiet, she moves like a fox
But now and again we talk of the Sox
The cut that she gives me, it’s never chancy
Fine by me, don’t need nothin’ fancy
Bonnie, she babbles with hardly a comma
Always ‘bout some kind of family drama
All of it comes as no big surprise
At least she is easy on these weary eyes
“Shall I trim the eyebrows?” Sure, I say, yes!
“The same for your ears?” If it bugs you, I guess
“Your nose hairs are startin’ to look kinda funny”
Just go ahead and get rid of ‘em, honey
Ten minutes, that’s all a cut ever takes
But I’m always struck, what a difference it makes
You tip the girl what, maybe three or four dollar?
And walk out of there felling two inches taller!
Pickin’ up Scamp, I gotta say
Margery must’ve got carried away
When Ida comes home, won’t she be surprised
To be met by a couple of sharp lookin’ guys?
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
Upcoming Book Events and Performances
November 26: Book Signing, Islandport Press Kiosk at the Maine Mall, 11:00am to 1:00pm, http://www.islandportpress.com/ South Portland, ME
December 3 & 4: A Very Ida Christmas, The Footlights Theatre, http://www.thefootlightsinfalmouth.com/ 2:00pm, Falmouth, ME
December 10: Book Signing, Kittery Trading Post, 11:00am to 2:00pm, https://www.kitterytradingpost.com/ Kittery, ME
December 13: A Holiday Visit with Ida, Kittery Historical and Naval Museum, http://www.kitterymuseum.com/ 7:00pm, Kittery, ME