A few weeks ago, my niece Caitlin called me up and asked if she could come over. “Needed my advice about something.”
I could tell she was upset. “Sure, dear, I’m here. Come on over. I’ll heat up some water for tea, and have my Certified Maine Life Guide Magic Moose Antlers at the ready!”
“Thanks, Aunt Ida.” Poor Caitlin said this with a little hitch in her voice, like she was tryin’ not to cry.
Charlie looks up from his paper. “What’s up?”
“Oh, that was Caitlin. She’s comin’ over in about an hour for some girl talk.”
“Trouble in paradise?”
“That’s what I’m guessing.”
Charlie downs the rest of his coffee, and gets up from the kitchen table. “I’m gonna make myself scarce.”
“Good thinking, but not so fast. I’m gonna whip up a pan of brownies, and we could use some ice cream. Would you mind...?
“Not at all. I gotta head that way, any how.”
That’s my guy. He knows chocolate has a way of takin’ the edge off, and with any luck, there’ll be some left over for him!
Caitlin and her boyfriend Adam live together up to the old Dugal Farm. They've been rentin’ it for a couple of years now. They got chickens and a wonderful vegetable garden, and are even thinkin’ about buying the place some day.
Caitlin arrives, and I could tell she’d been cryin.’ “Oh, Caitlin, come here. Aunt Ida’s gonna make it all better.” I wrap her in a big bear hug, then tell her to sit down.
“But before we get into it,” I says, “we need some nourishment. You know, to keep up our strength. And I just happen to have some hot from the oven brownies, right here.” I put the pan on the table, along with some tea and a couple of bowls. Then I go to the freezer, and return with the two pints of ice cream Charlie picked up. “The doctor is in!”
That got a chuckle out of her.
I says, “Take two of these and call me in the morning. Let’s see, we have Coffee Heath Bar and Cherry Garcia.”
We proceeded to fill up our bowls and get down to business. Turns out Caitlin and Adam had been arguing ‘bout something the night before. No need to get into the particulars here. Suffice to say, it was a big one.
Caitlin says, “You shouldn’t go to bed mad, right? I mean, that’s what they say. Even though we were both too tired, we kept going at it, and we ended up saying stuff we shouldn’t have.”
“Oh, Caitlin, believe me, I’ve been there. I don’t know who “they” are, but sometimes I just want to ring their necks! I suppose yes, in a perfect world, that’s a good rule. Trouble is, we don’t live in a perfect world.
“Next time (and there will be a next time), if you’re getting into it and you’re beyond tired, stop talkin’ and just go to bed. Same room, separate rooms, it don’t matter. Just don’t leave the house and return the next morning. That’s only gonna make matters worse. Sleep on it. Things always look better in the morning. At the very least, you’ve calmed down and maybe you can actually hear what your mate is saying.”
“Probably,” she says, all teary-eyed. “But right now, I’m afraid the damage is done. I just feel so bad.”
“I know, dear. But you and Adam love each other. You’ll work out.”
“But he was up before me and left for work without sayin’ good bye.”
“He’s probably feeling as bad as you, Caitlin. Why don’t you text him, and say you’re sorry?”
“I am sorry I said some of those things I did. But I still think I’m right.”
“Well, he don’t need to know what you’re sorry about.”
Just then, Caitlin’s phone beeped. It was a text from Adam, sayin’ he was sorry, and they’ll talk when he gets home from work. And would she like him to pick up a pizza on the way? He’s a keeper, that fella.
Well, as you can imagine, that brightened Caitlin’s mood right quick. We celebrated by havin’ more brownies and ice cream than was probably good for us. Then, I gave her some to take home to Adam. Not all of ‘em, you understand ‘cause my Charlie’s a keeper, too.
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
Upcoming Shows and Book Events
March 28 & 29: The Moose in Me, The Moose in You, The Footlights, Saturday at 7:30 p.m. & Sunday at 2:00 p.m., Falmouth, ME
April 17: The Moose in Me, The Moose in You, The Firehouse Center for the Arts, 8:00 p.m., Newburyport, MA
May 26: Book Reading Finding Your Inner Moose, Old Town Public Library, 11:00 a.m., Old Town, ME
For a good time, call Ida! I love entertaining groups, small and large! The following are wicked fun for after lunch, after dinner, rewards banquets, keynote speeches and what not.
For more information, drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org
And if your book group wants to read Finding Your Inner Moose, I'd love to be part of the discussion. Especially if there's food involved!